Waiting for Superman
by StUpIdLoVeLeTtEr
Summary: Ten years ago I left behind the only life that I knew all due to a college fling that didn't mean as much as I thought it did. I got pregnant, I had nowhere to go and no one to turn to. So I started anew in Chicago, made a life for us and then tragedy struck and I am trying to pick up the pieces of my life. It's time to come home, and face the music. Before it's too late.


Waiting for Superman

I sighed heavily while fidgeting in my seat for the hundredth time. I have always been uncomfortable in hospitals, even when I was pregnant. But now, after everything that has happened, I can barely walk through the main entrance without having a mild panic attack.

"Isabella Swan?" I looked up to see the nurse waiting for me with a smile.

_Well let's get this over with shall we?_

"That's me."

"Let's get you back here and get these tests started so you can get out of here." I nodded my head once and followed her to the back where the doctor quickly started my tests. I was in and out within an hour.

"Now Bella you look like you are doing well for yourself." Doctor Reynolds smiled down at me as I sat on the bed in the small room waiting to be released.

"I have been, I still have those bad days of course but I am getting through. As long as I can still keep up with my nine year old and my twenty eight year old best friend I think I should be good right?" I joked lightly. He smiled softly and continued reading over my file.

"That's good, very good actually. Well you know that the results won't be in for another week or two and so for now it is just a waiting game. But I have a good feeling that we have beat this and it won't be back. Now tell me, are you still planning on moving?" _Oh yeah, I almost forgot. _

"Actually, I leave in a few days. It's time to go back to my roots and face my past, it's been a long time coming."

"I'm glad to hear that Bella, now I got in contact with a colleague of mine in Seattle and he is willing to take over your care. I took the liberty of making you an appointment to meet him on the thirteenth of next month. Sooner depending on the results of your test, here is his contact information in case you need to see him sooner. And I mean this Bella, you know the signs, you know your body. No one else does, so if something feels off you have to call him or go straight to the hospital, do you understand me?" I smirked slightly, very protective this one. I mean when you have gone through a journey such as mine with one person for four years you tend to develop a close relationship.

"I promise Don. Thank you so much for everything you have done for me and my son. It means a lot to me."

"It has been my pleasure Bella, please stay in touch of course. I'd like to keep updated on how you and your son are doing. If you need anything at all you know not to hesitate to call me."

"I know that. Thank you again." I whispered while standing and putting the card he gave me into my purse. He enveloped me in a hug and walked me out to the front entrance.

"You be careful now, and have a safe trip."

"I will."

With those parting words I made my way to the parking lot, feeling ten pounds lighter as I got into the car. Driving home with the windows down and the music up, that's the best part of summers in Chicago, and I love summer.

A smile tugged at my lips when I pulled up to my apartment complex to see Chase and Johnny standing out front waiting for me with flowers and a box of chocolates. I parked the car on the street as usual and got out slowly, they always greeted me like this after my yearly checkups. And this is only my second one since I had gotten sick.

"Hey guys." I greeted with a smile as Chase jumped into my arms.

"Hey mom! Are you okay? What did the doctor say?" He asked while looking up at mw with those big green eyes. My nine year old was so worrisome, caring, and the biggest mama's boy in the world. _In my opinion, and many others'. _

"You know we won't know the results for a while but the doctor is very confident that I will be okay."

"Good!" He exclaims excitedly while kissing me on the cheek. I squeezed him once in my arms before setting him down and walking over to my best friend.

"Hey gorgeous! You look great, these are for you." He handed me my flowers and kissed my cheek sweetly.

"Thanks Johnny. He wasn't any trouble was he?" I asked as we followed Chase up the steps to the apartment. _So independent this one, a little too independent for my liking but…what can I do?_

"He was perfect as usual. Now, what is this I hear about you moving and leaving me behind?" He asked with a hurt look in his eye, oh right I hadn't told him yet. _Damn. _

"I was gonna tell you I swear. How did you find out?"

"I found out at the office, they gave your job to some bimbo that has been trying to get in my pants." I barked out a laugh as we entered the empty elevator behind my son. He just glared at me from the corner of his eye while pushing the button for my floor.

"And you haven't let her?"

"Not my type." He muttered in annoyance as we rode to the top with Chase chatting excitedly, telling me about his day in great detail. Effectively halting our conversation for the time being as he loved being center stage and hated being interrupted.

"Yeah you don't have a type." I said once Chase was in his room and we were alone in the kitchen. I sat my flowers on the counter top and set to opening the chocolates that were always my undoing. _Freaking truffles. _

"You are my type but you won't let me have that. Besides, I just haven't met the right girl yet. Anyway, back to the fact that you think you are leaving Chicago without me." I rolled my eyes, I wasn't gonna have him leave his life behind for me. He has lived here his whole life, I came around halfway through college and threw a wrench in his life that I didn't mean to do.

He didn't care though, he introduced me to all his friends and took care of me when he found out I was pregnant. He never left my side, even when I got sick. He is the only reason I have any friends here in Chicago. I don't know what I would do without Johnny in my life, I need him more than a fish needs water. But I can't ask this of him.

"Johnny, I don't wanna leave you but I can't ask you to leave your life behind. Chicago is all you know."

"No Bella! You and Chase are all I know! I can't let you leave without me, which is why," He paused with a devious look in his eyes…oh no, I know that look all too well. "I took the liberty of transferring with you, since I am already your assistant they didn't see a problem with it. So where are we living?" I didn't know what to say, I was gaping at him like a fish out of water. I had no words, I knew he was crazy but I didn't know it ran this deep.

"Are you serious right now?" I asked in a low whisper.

"Yeah, you really think you were going anywhere without me?"

"I had hoped I wouldn't have to." I admitted in a small voice, avoiding his gaze as it was smoldering me. I love him too much to lose him.

"You never have to do anything alone Bella, I'll always be here. So, how long do I have to pack?" He asked with a smirk as he popped one of my chocolates into his mouth.

"We leave Friday."

"Cool, my lease is up so now I don't have to renew it. What about you?"

"I informed my landlord a month in advance so I am good."

"Awesome." He leaned across the counter to kiss my cheek before heading to Chase's room.

I smiled to myself, well at least I will have one person with me. This is gonna be the hardest thing I have had to do in my life, well scratch that. Getting diagnosed with breast cancer was the hardest thing I have had to go through and that definitely takes center stage on this one.

Sighing I leaned up against the counter, I was just so tired. I can't lie anymore and I can't keep Chase away from his father anymore. Hell, I never wanted to in the first place but I had to. With everything that had happened there was nothing I could do, I had no choice. I had to leave, when I found out I was pregnant I tried to get in contact with him, any of them. The only one I could get ahold of was Carlisle, he had always been so gracious towards me. He was like my second father.

"_Hello?" _

"_Carlisle? It's Bella Swan." My heart was pounding in my ears, and a lump rose in my throat instantly. _

"_Bella? How are you sweetie? I've been so worried about you, where have you been? We tried finding you but you disappeared and your father wouldn't tell us where you went." He truly did care about me. That's good to know. _

"_Um, I am alright. I was calling to see if there was any way I could get in touch with Ed-um, him." There was a few beats of silence on the line before he answered me. _

"_He doesn't live in Forks anymore sweetie, he actually hasn't spoken to any of us since you left. He has been beating himself up the most, he misses you terribly, and he won't answer any of our calls. Especially mine." _

"_Oh…well, I need to talk to him Carlisle, please. It's important." He sighed slightly and I knew he was giving in. A lot had happened and I knew his and his son's relationship was the one that suffered the most…but I needed this. _

"_I'll try Bella, but there is no guarantee that he will listen to me or believe me. But I give you my word that I will do everything in my power. Can I keep this number and call you? So we can stay in touch?" I found myself smiling as I looked down at my protruding stomach, Johnny's eyes burning into the side of my head. _

"_Of course Carlisle. Thank you so much."_

_I sighed heavily and hung up the phone, the wounds are still fresh and I am still hurting so badly from the things he said and the things they did. But, I have to tell him that I am pregnant. He has a right to know, no matter how he feels about me. He needs to know that he is going to be a father, then the ball will be in his court on what he chooses to do. _

I never knew that when Carlisle called me again it would be to tell me that his son had took his call, and that he in fact did not believe that I got in touch. He was awful to his father, and it broke Carlisle more than I would ever know. And that was when I decided that he didn't need to know about his child.

Not if he was going to treat his own father so terribly. Carlisle and I stayed in touch, he never told his family that he knew where I was though. Or that I had a son, but there was one thing I had never told Carlisle, the reason why I had no explanation for ignoring his phone calls for four years. Only texting and emailing until I was alright enough to start calling again.

He was suspicious and he made that known every time we talked, but that was not something I needed to reveal over the phone. Hell I flew both my parents out to Chicago to tell them, if Carlisle suddenly flew out to Chicago then that would rise too many questions that couldn't be answered.

So, I didn't tell him. And I made my dad swear not to let it get out in the airwaves of Forks' gossip about my sickness. I didn't need gossip going on where I couldn't control it and whom it got to.

I didn't want anyone back in my hometown knowing, especially because I didn't want it getting back to _him. _I don't need or want sympathy from a man who threw me to the curb so coldly after proclaiming his love to me.

I was barely able to suppress the sharp pain that shot through my chest at the mere thought of it. Love can be a wonderful thing, but it can also be the worst thing to ever happen to you. One half of me wishes I had never fallen in love, the other half-the mother half; is glad that I fell in love.

Because if I hadn't of fallen in love, had a fling with an older man while I was a sophomore in college, then I wouldn't have my son, and I wouldn't have the amazing friends I have now. I never would have met Johnny, and now that I know him I cannot imagine my life without him. It would just be incomplete.

"Mom!" I was pulled from my thoughts as my nine year old came barreling into the room wearing a giant grin that had me smiling brightly.

"What is it baby?" I asked curiously while picking him up and setting him on the counter in front of me. He giggled, it's been a while since I have been able to pick him up and he has missed it immensely. Even though we both knew he would never admit to it, _nine year olds_. It was still a hard task of course, but I wanted normalcy and so I would have normalcy to the best of my ability.

"Uncle Johnny and I packed my room up! Now you don't have to worry about it!" He said with such excitement it was hard not to smile. They really did that? Was I thinking for that long? I looked up at Johnny to see him smiling sheepishly at me and rubbing the back of his neck.

"I didn't want you to have to worry about everything, I see you got a lot packed and I didn't want you getting too tired before the trip."

I walked over to him and pulled him into my arms for a hug, whispering my thanks in his ear before kissing his cheek and returning to my son.

"That was very sweet of you boys." I whispered while leaving as kiss on his forehead.

"Are we almost packed and ready to go mom?" He asked with those big curious green eyes he inherited from his father. He looks so much like him, but at the same time he doesn't…if that makes sense. He had a mixture of the both of us, his eyes, my hair color with curls and a red tint.

"Yeah, I just have to finish my room and a few more things in the living room and we will be ready. The movers come tomorrow at noon so I should have it done by then."

"I'll stay the night and help, are you taking the furniture with you?" Johnny asked curiously. There was no question with him, he made a decision and you had to go with it whether you liked it or not. But he always kept your best interest at heart.

"No, I am selling it to the landlord. I have new furniture waiting on us in Seattle, dad picked it up for me and took it to the house I bought."

"How many bedrooms?" I rolled my eyes, here comes the protective, always thinking safety and long haul Johnny Damron.

"Four bedrooms, three baths, two car garage, basement fully renovated, a beautiful kitchen, fairly big backyard, gorgeous front porch and a big ass living room. Must I go on?" Johnny rolled his eyes, he knew better than to think my father wouldn't go out and see the house and send me pictures.

My dad would never let me buy a house without checking it first, and because I couldn't be there to see it in person he had to do it. I am glad he did too, he didn't leave anything out, and I didn't expect anything less. And if it gets the dad or the Johnny stamp of approval then you know it is a good place.

"Alright you got me there." He muttered while heading to the fridge to grab a beer.

"Okay baby boy go get your bath and then get some pjs on. It's almost time for bed." I picked him up off the counter, he is getting too big for me to pick him up, and sent him to the bathroom. He ran off and I was finally able to breathe, I felt as if I had been holding my breath all day long.

Hell, it feels like I have been holding my breath for ten years.

"Hey, you okay?" I looked up to see Johnny standing beside me, not hovering, but standing protectively over me. If anyone cared about me in this world, besides my son and my family, it was Johnny.

"I'm fine, I just…feel so drained Johnny. The past ten years of my life have been crazy and I feel like I am just now regaining my footing. I don't know how to act, I don't know how to live without pill after pill and doctor's visits once every year as opposed to everyday. I don't know where to go from here, and now I am moving back to my hometown, the one place I swore I would never go back to. I don't know how to take this. It's like I am moving on autopilot, and I don't know what that is because I haven't truly lived in the past six years. I don't know what it is like to live anymore Johnny. I don't know what to do with myself."

By this point tears were streaming down my cheeks and I could barely hold my own weight. I was leaning heavily against the counter as silent sobs wracked through my chest. I couldn't take much more of this. Especially if I was truly about to go through with my plans of going back home and dragging my skeletons from the closet I had tried so hard to keep them in.

"Bells, hey come here." He pulled me into his arms and I couldn't hold back the sobs any longer.

"Are you sure you wanna go through with this? It can't be good for your health and I have a feeling that this is gonna be a lot of drama…I mean everything you told me was crazy Bella and I wasn't there and so I don't really know every little detail but I know enough. This could not be healthy for you baby, are you _truly_ sure about this?" I looked up at him, he had so much compassion and worry in his eyes. He cares so much about me, I'm glad I have him.

"I have to do this Johnny, I have to give Chase the chance to know his father. I can't keep hiding. I won't do it anymore."

He looked down into my eyes and studied me closely, if anyone knew me anymore…it was Johnny. He knows me inside and out, he truly is my best friend and nothing can ever change that. He knows what I am thinking, he can tell when something is bothering me, and he knows when I am hurting or am in pain. He's been with me through everything.

"Alright, you know I'll be there with you every step of the way. Now, get go your munchkin ready for bed and I will start in on the rest of the living room." He kissed my head before sending me off with a pat on the butt.

I just shook my head and went off to Chase's room that was now bare as all his stuff was packed away in boxes that will be leaving tomorrow. A few clothes and toys were left unpacked so he would have something to preoccupy his time with of course, I'm not stupid.

"Hey baby, I see you're all snuggled up already." I said with a smile as I sat down on his bed. He smiled up at me and laughed as I tickled his sides softly.

"Do I get a story?" he asked once he had calmed down and we were both smiling like fools. I knew he would want a story, I've been telling him stories about his father since before he knew what I was saying. He loved them. And it helped me tell him more about his father, it helped to appease him until he actually got to meet him, if he ever does.

"Of course you do baby. Hm, let me think. How about the time your dad and I went to the zoo together?" His eyes got real big and he got the biggest smile on his face. He loved hearing stories of me and his father. Yeah…wish it was easier for me to tell them.

"It was an unusually sunny day in Seattle and we wanted to go out and do something for a change. So your dad took me to the zoo, we spent all day there. He took me to all the exhibits, he took me to eat and we took millions of pictures. He also bought me a pink elephant because you know how much your mom loves elephants. He also bought me a cute little zebra that still sits on my bed."

"Zebras are your favorite! Uncle Johnny and I always get you one for your birthday!" I couldn't help but to smile. I can't even count all the zebras I have.

"That's exactly right, so after we finished walking around the zoo for _hours _your dad had another surprise for me. Your dad was so sweet baby, I'm sure he still is but I don't know that for sure anymore. Like I've told you, something happened and we just fell apart. That happens, but I need you to know that I loved your father very much. He treated your mother very well, and it showed in everything he did. So, after our day at the zoo we went back to his house and we watched movies, it was something simple. And you know how much I love simple, but that wasn't the surprise."

"What was it?" he asked eagerly, his eyes drooping slightly.

"He gave me a ring, this one actually." I pulled the necklace I was wearing out from under my shirt to show him the diamond ring that was strung on the chain. His eyes widened when he saw the sparkle of the pretty diamond.

"It was a promise ring, a promise that…no matter what we would always find our way back to one another." I whispered, trying to suppress the tears.

"It's pretty. Are you guys gonna get back together?" I blanched, this was the first time he had ever asked _that _question. And he was very inquisitive about his father.

"Um, I don't know honey. The situation is complicated, I tried to call your dad and tell him about you when I found out I was pregnant but he would never return his families calls. So for now, until I can reach him, he doesn't know about you. But my main priority is you, and it always will be. When we get to Washington let's get settled first and then I will start looking for him."

"And then I can meet him?"

"After he and I have had the chance to talk, like I said. I don't know what he is like now, and people change. I am sure he would love to meet you though."

"What if he doesn't like me?" he asked with a yawn while closing his eyes. I leaned over and kissed his head before standing.

"He will love you." With that I turned his lamp off and slipped out of the room, shutting the door quietly behind me.

"Those stories make me angrier every time you tell em Bells." Johnny grits as I walk into the living room to help pack up the last box, he works fast. Now only my room is left.

"Yeah, they aren't much easier for me to tell. Okay, can we not talk about this? I'm drained and I just wanna finish packing so we can go to bed."

"Alright that's fine with me baby girl. Let's hop to it!" I giggled at his enthusiasm, I swear he is never tired a day in his life. He is almost more energetic than my nine year old, and that is saying something.

The rest of the night was spent with light conversation and laughter as we finished packing my room and moving the boxes to the living room for the movers when they arrived in the morning. We finished with good time too, it was only eleven thirty when we finally crawled into my big queen sized bed.

"Night B."

"Night Johnny, stay on your side!"

"_Dammit!" _I giggled like a little school girl before easily falling asleep.

* * *

><p>"Hello?"<p>

"Hey daddy."

"Bella! Hey honey, did you guys get in alright?" I smiled as I listened to my father's voice, I have missed him so much.

"Yeah we actually just landed. Are you working today? Do you mind if we come and get my car and stop by to see you?"

"No not at all, I'd love to see you guys, you brother is actually coming over today I know he will be excited to see you!" My smile widened at the mention of my brother, I haven't seen him since he came to Chicago to see me last year. I really miss him, he was my rock when everything went down ten years ago.

"Sounds great, we'll be down soon."

"Alright baby I love you."

"I love you too daddy."

I hung up the phone and joined my two favorite boys over by baggage claim where they had already grabbed our luggage. I smiled at them as I approached with the key to our rental.

"Ready to go see Grandpa, Chase?"

"Yeah!"

"Alright let's go." Johnny grabbed the bigger bags and I took mine and his carry on while Chase carried his backpack and duffle.

"You don't mind driving do you?" I asked Johnny quietly, slightly out of breath as we made it to the rental half way down the lot. He looked at me through the corner of his eye, suspicion and worry caking his features as he watched me intently. He was always on edge when it came to my health, he wasn't the only one and I didn't blame him but it could get a little annoying.

"I don't mind, you tired?" he asked concerned as we put the bags in the trunk as Chase got in the back seat.

"Just a little, haven't traveled in a while is all."

"Bella don't give me that _bullshit_." He snapped in annoyance, looking me straight in the eye. All joking was out the window when it came to me and my wellbeing.

"Johnny, I'm fine. I just need a nap, I'll sleep on the way to Forks okay?" He watched me carefully, calculating his next move. Finally he nodded his head once stiffly and took the keys from me.

Once settled in I laid back slightly and covered up with my blanket I kept out for the plane ride. I felt a kiss to my temple just as I closed my eyes and heard the soft voice of my baby boy whispering in my ear.

"Sleep good mom, feel better." My heart clenched in my chest, I couldn't say anything back I just bit my tongue and let myself drift off to sleep.

Chanting that I was fine and it was nothing to worry about. _I'm fine, I haven't traveled since before Chase was born….it just took a lot out of me, and all that packing. That's what it is, nothing to worry about. Nothing at all…_

* * *

><p>"Bella, baby we're here." I sat up slightly and looked around a little disoriented. Looking around my surroundings I could faintly make out the greenery of Forks. Finally my eyes landed on the white two story house that had been my childhood home.<p>

I smiled a small smile before stretching out and looking to Johnny, noticing my little monkey wasn't in the back seat anymore.

"He went on in with your dad, he didn't wanna wake you 'cause you looked so peaceful but I told him I would get you up." He whispered softly, his eyes penetrating as he studied me like a science experiment.

He was just worried, but I was okay now. I felt refreshed and brand new, well almost. But I wasn't as tired as when we got off the plane.

"Well, are we gonna sit here or are we going in? I'd like to see my dad and brother." This brought a smile to his face, thank god.

We got out of the car and walked into my childhood home arm in arm. The sounds of laughter filtered from the living room and it warmed my heart, I hadn't noticed Garrett's car already in the drive until we got to the front door. I'm excited to see him and my dad. I've missed them a lot.

"Bella!"

"Garrett!" I squealed in excitement as he ran up to me and pulled me into his arms, spinning me in a circle and holding me tightly in his arms. I've missed his bear hugs and his scruffy beard on my cheek. You'd think being a doctor he would be cleaner shaven but nope, not my brother.

"I've missed you baby sis. And look at you, you look a lot better Bells. And look at that hair, grew back curlier than ever. I'm guessing you're leaving it short huh?" He asked with a bright smile once he had finally set me down.

"Yeah, I don't wanna deal with it long again. Plus I like it this way and I am just happy that I have hair again." _They said it wasn't bad enough and that my hair wouldn't fall out…well weren't we all surprised when it started coming out in clumps?_

"Do I get a hug?" He asked with a soft smile and a twinkle in his eye.

"Of course you do daddy." I whispered with thick emotion as I stepped out of my brother's arms and into my fathers.

"I've missed you, and your brother is right. You look great baby."

"Thanks daddy, I've missed you too."

We stood in one another's arms for a little while longer until my oaf of a best friend decided to ruin the moment.

"I don't know about you kid but I'm getting bored with all this emotional crap."

"I should have left you in Chicago." I muttered in fake seriousness as I pulled away from Charlie's arms.

"That hurts Bell." He said while feigning hurt and putting his hands over his heart. Garrett and Charlie were trying to suppress their laughter at the situation.

"Stop being such a drama queen, you're a bad influence on my son." This had him gaping at me like a fish and my dad and brother laughing hysterically. _Our relationship, isn't it beautiful?_

I rolled my eyes and made my way into the living room to sit down on the couch beside a smiling Chase, he was used to this so it didn't faze him much.

"Why don't you tell Grandpa Charlie and Uncle Gar about the plane ride baby?"

"_Mom, _I'm not a baby anymore." He groaned while giving me those puppy green eyes of his.

"Sorry, sorry. Won't happen again." I said with a smirk as I held my hands up in surrender. He was growing up too damn fast for my liking.

He went into a really long and animated description of our journey and all the new things he experienced. It was his first time on a plane and he loved every second of it, and he didn't mind the attention he got from the flight attendants either.

_Neither did Johnny. _I thought with a roll of my eyes.

"Hey B, where is the pharmacy around here?" John asked with a quirk of his brow once Chase had finished his story, he knew better than to interrupt the little ball of fury.

"You'll never find it honey, what do you need?" I asked while standing up and grabbing my car keys from the hook in the kitchen. I am so glad I had my car sent out here, I've missed it and it has only been three days.

I offered to go because let's face it Johnny is probably the biggest dipshit on the face of this earth and with that being said he is absolutely terrible with directions. He'd get lost before he pulled out of the driveway, if it hadn't of been for the GPS in the rental he never would have found Charlie's house.

"My doctor back in Chicago called my prescription in and it should be here today."

"I'll get it for you. You stick here with the Swan men and I'll be back, I need some fresh air anyway."

"You sure you're up for driving Bells?" He asked with a dubious look in his eye. So I retorted with a 'shut the hell up look' and he did so. Driving calms me and they all knew it.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. Come give me a hug Chase I'll be back." He bounded up to me and jumped up into my arms, planting a big wet kiss on my cheek.

"I love you." I kissed him back and set him on his feet once again.

"Love you mom be careful." There was a pang in my chest at his words…the same words _Edward _used many times. I smiled it off and headed out the door as the men yelled for me to be careful and to call if I needed them.

_Man they are so overprotective. _

I shook my head, got in my baby and headed for Forks pharmacy smack dab in the middle of town. I knew someone was bound to see me of course and that didn't surprise me in the slightest, there are just a few select people that I wish to avoid. Like, the Cullen's, Jessica Stanley, Mike Newton…I don't need such a reunion just yet, and I definitely don't need drama or gossip starting off so quickly.

The gossip is sure to happen of course and I am definitely expecting it, but I really don't need it my first day back.

I passed through the small little town and made my way to the small shopping center that consisted of the market, Newton's sporting goods, the pharmacy and the gas station. Nothing special in this Podunk town.

With a deep breath I grabbed my purse and stepped out of my black window tinted car and headed for the pharmacy with my head held high, praying no one talked to me. I was aware of the stares I was receiving as I made my way toward the pharmacy, some were pointing and whispering, others were looking on suspiciously and trying to figure out who the hell I was.

I looked different since the last time I was here, I'm not nineteen years old anymore. I am a twenty nine year old woman, curly brown hair that barely reached the tops of my shoulders, it was lighter now too, and almost blonde but that is just the way it grew back. I've had a kid and gone through a battle with breast cancer since the last time these people saw me, all that is bound to change a woman.

What these people thought of me didn't really matter much though. I never had many friends when I lived in Forks, I had my brother, Alistair whom was my best friend in the whole world, Alice Cullen, Edward Masen-Cullen, Emmett McCarthy and Miracle Daniels who, besides Alistair, I have missed like crazy.

We were the three musketeers Alistair, Miracle and I.

I nearly let a tear escape at that thought, they probably won't talk to me now even if I were to run into them. I miss them a lot, I called them after I left, individually and then together. They missed me, they wanted to come and see me but I told them it would be too hard on me when they left. I didn't wanna tell them the truth…that I had breast cancer and I didn't want them seeing their best friend like that.

They always wrote me though, every day I would get a letter from each of them. Saying how much they missed me, how much they loved me and wished they had the money to come see me or stay with me for a while.

We talked through Charlie after a while, I told him he could keep them updated on me. And boy did he, they always told me what they talked about every time they wrote. It brought a smile and tears to my eyes. I still have all the letters they sent me, they are packed up in a box somewhere at the new house.

I really hope that I can see them soon, explain everything to them. Why I left, well they knew that reason…they were the only ones in Forks who knew that I had a child-besides my dad, Garrett, and Carlisle of course-why I didn't let them come see me, why I wouldn't talk on the phone.

I wanted to tell it all. And I needed them to be the first to hear it, and then I would find Edward. But, if I didn't see them before Edward then he will definitely be the first to know…well no, not about my previous bout with cancer but I will tell him about Chase and then…maybe I will tell him. _Maybe._

It just depends on who he is now.

I shook the thoughts as I headed into the pharmacy, looking around to refresh my memory until I saw the pharmacist standing behind the counter sorting some medication. I shivered, I hate taking pills…

"Hi, excuse me. I'm here to pick up a prescription." The man looked up at me and both our eyes widened. _Speak of the devil. _

"Alistair? What…what are you doing here?" I was barely able to rasp out even the slightest whisper.

"Be-Bella? Is that you? Oh my god I never thought I was gonna see you of all people back in Forks. How are you baby? It's been so long, what are you doing here?" his grey eyes were full of shock as he leaned up against the counter for support.

"Um, I'm moving to Seattle. I wanted to be closer to Charlie, Chase needs his grandpa and Uncle in his life. Well, both Uncles I guess since Johnny decided to bring himself along." I huffed with a slight eye roll, he watched my every movement as if I were going to disappear at any second.

"Johnny, that's the friend who helped you in Chicago right?"

"Yeah that's him. So look at you, a pharmacist huh? What happened to becoming a doctor hot shot?" I asked with a smile, he returned it full force…same Alistair I know and love.

"Yeah well I had to take a year off from school after that car accident I was in and so I kind of fell behind. I'm taking classes at Seattle to finish up my degree, this just pays the bills for now."

"I know how that goes." I said with a rueful smile. _Boy did I ever. _

"Yeah having Chase must've been a dozy. So, what can I get for you milady?" he asked in a grand gesture, making me laugh just like old times. I wasn't about to correct him, not just yet anyway.

"I need to pick up Johnny's prescription. It should be under Damron."

"Alright, so are you two together or?" he let the question filter off as he grabbed Johnny's meds. I rolled my eyes, _why do people always ask that?_

"No Johnny and I are not together, he is like a brother to me. Just like you and Miracle. He was there for me when I didn't have anybody in a big city. He helped me through my pregnancy and a pretty rough time." I whispered the last bit as I averted my eyes.

I can't tell him here, and I definitely can't tell him without Mir.

"Okay, okay. I'll take a hint, so do I get to call you now that you are back for good?" he asked with a playful smirk as he rang me up. Johnny owes me for this.

"Yes, my number is still the same and if it is okay with you I'd like to get you and Mir together one day soon and talk. There is some stuff I wanted to tell you guys and I really didn't wanna do it over the phone."

_Why are you acting so skittish? It's not like you are telling him right now. _

He looked at me closely, he knew me better than anyone…maybe even Johnny, and he knew when something was on my mind. But he would never push me to tell him until I was ready, that's one of the best things about Alistair…so easy to get alone with.

"Yeah, I'll call him when I get off work and then I will call you to set up a day and time. Here you go, you look great by the way Bells." I blushed scarlet as I took the medicine and stuffed my card back into my wallet as the bell on the door rang to signal another customer.

"Thanks Al, I'll see you later."

"Yes you will, you aren't getting away from us again sweetheart." I giggled and waved while turning to leave.

I stopped dead in my tracks before I could even take two steps…oh _shit._

"Isabella?" Green eyes met brown when I looked up into the devil's face itself.

"Esme…hi."

I felt as if I had just gotten punched in the gut, all the breath had left my lungs in a whopping whoosh. This was the exact thing I feared would happen, she was definitely the one Cullen I did not want to see so soon.

"Wow, I never thought I would see you here ever again. How long are you staying?" she asked with a condescending look, as if she truly cared.

"I'm just passing through Forks actually. I just moved to Seattle, we got in today actually." _Why am I telling her this? She doesn't care, and I don't need to be indulging her. First thing she will do is go and tell her family she saw me. _

"Oh well I assume you will be in Forks seeing your father a lot yes?"

"As much as I can, but I will be in Seattle for the better part of the month trying to get settled into the house." _Tread lightly Bella this woman is quicksand and you know it. _

"Well I hope you get settled." She gave me a fake smile and stepped around me to get to the counter where I was sure Alistair had been paying extra close attention to the conversation.

I took a deep breath and started to make my way from the pharmacy when she called my attention once more. I turned slowly to look at her, she had a sinister smile on her face of course…why does this not surprise me?

"Yes?"

"Expect a visit from Alice the next time you are in town." _Shit. _

Without saying a word I turned on my heel and left, who the hell does that woman think she is?! _Ugh!_

With a heavy heart I made my way back to Charlie's house, if she was going to tell Alice I was here….then she sure as hell would tell the rest of that family.

Which means Edward will be knocking on my door soon. _Great, just great Bella. _


End file.
